Role Model

OK, I'm going to attempt to drown myself

You can try this at home

You can be just like me!

Mic check one two.. we recordin?

I'm cancerous, so when I diss you wouldn't wanna answer this

If you responded back with a battle rap you wrote for Canibus

I strangled you to death then I choked you again

Then break your fuckin legs till your bones poke through your skin

You beef wit me, I'ma even the score equally

Take you on Jerry Springer, and beat yer ass legally

I get you blunted off of funny home grown

Cause when I smoke out I hit the trees harder than Sonny Bono

(Ohh no!!)  So if I said I never did drugs

That would mean I lie AND get fucked more than the President does

Hillary Clinton tried to slap me and call me a pervert

I ripped her fuckin tonsils out and fed her sherbet (Bitch!)

My nerves hurt, and lately I'm on edge

Grabbed Vanilla Ice and ripped out his blonde dreads (Fuck you!)

Every girl I ever went out wit is goin lez

Follow me and do exactly what the song says:

smoke weed, take pills, drop outta school, kill people and drink

And jump behind the wheel like it was still legal

I'm dumb enough to walk in a store and steal

So I'm dumb enough to ask for a date with Lauryn Hill

Some people only see that I'm white, ignorin skill

Cause I stand out like a green hat with a orange bill

But I don't get pissed, y'all don't even see through the mist

How the fuck can I be white, I don't even exist

I get a clean shave, bathe, go to a rave

Die from an overdose and dig myself up out of my grave

My middle finger won't go down, how do I wave?

And this is how I'm supposed to teach kids how to behave?

        Now follow me and do exactly what you see

Don't you wanna grow up to be just like me!

        I slap women and eat shrooms then O.D.

Now don't you wanna grow up to be just like me!

Me and Marcus Allen went over to see Nicole

When we heard a knock at the door, must have been Ron Gold'

Jumped behind the door, put the orgy on hold

Killed em both and smeared blood in a white Bronco (we did it!)

My mind won't work if my spine don't jerk

I slapped Garth Brooks out of his Rhinestone shirt

I'm not a player just a ill rhyme sayer

That'll spray an Aerosol can up at the ozone layer (psssssssh)

My rap style's warped, I'm runnin out the morgue

witcha dead grandmother's corpse to throw it on your porch

Jumped in a Chickenhawk cartoon wit a cape on

And beat up Foghorn Leghorn with an acorn

I'm bout as normal as Norman Bates, with deformative traits

A premature birth that was four minutes late

Mother.. are you there?  I love you

I never meant to hit you over the head with that shovel

Will someone explain to my brain that I just severed

a main vein with a chainsaw and I'm in pain?

I take a breather and sighed; either I'm high, or I'm nuts

Cause if you ain't tiltin this room, neither am I

So when you see your mom with a thermometer shoved in her ass

Then it probably is obvious I got it on with her

Cause when I drop this solo shit it's over with

I bought Cage's tape, opened it, and dubbed over it

        I came to the club drunk with a fake ID

Don't you wanna grow up to be just like me!

        I've been with 10 women who got HIV

Now don't you wanna grow up to be just like me!

        I got genital warts and it burns when I pee

Don't you wanna grow up to be just like me!

        I tie a rope around my penis and jump from a tree

You probably wanna grow up to be just like me!!!